*THE INTELLIGENT DOG*

A young boy goes off to college. Half way through the semester, having foolishly squandered all his money ... he calls home.

"Dad" he says, "You won't believe what modern education is developing!
They actually have a program here in our institution that will teach our dog,Jack, how to talk!"

"That's amazing,"his father says. "How do I get Jack in that program?"

"Just send him down here with $10,000" the young boy says,
“and I'll get him in the course."

So his father sends the dog and$10,000. About two-thirds of the way through the semester, the money again runs out. 

The boy calls home.

"So how's Jack doing son?" his father asks.

"Awesome, dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won't believe this -- they've had such good results they have started to teach the animals how to read!"

"Read ??"says his father.

"No kidding! How do we get Jack in that program?"

"Just send $20,000, I'll get him in the class."

The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem.

At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk, nor read. 

So he shoots the dog!!!

When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited.

"Where's Jack? I just can't wait to see him read something and talk!"

"Dad" the boy says, "I have some grim news.  Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Jack was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading The Economic Times, like he usually does. Then Jack turned to me and asked, "So, is your father still having an affair with that pretty lady Rachel?who lives down the street ?"

The father went white and exclaimed ... "I hope you shot that son of a bitch before he talks to your Mother!"?

"I sure did, dad!

"That's my boy!"

The kid went on to law school and is now a lawyer.