MY DOCTOR ...
Let me tell you about my doctor.
He's very good!

If you tell him you want a second opinion,
He'll go out and come in again.
~~~~~

He treated one woman for yellow jaundice for three years
Before he realized she was Chinese.
~~~~~

Another time, he gave a patient six months to live.
At the end of the six months, the patient hadn't paid his bill,
So, the doctor gave him another six months.
~~~~~
While he was talking to me, his nurse came in and said,
"Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he's invisible."
The doctor said, "Tell him I can't see him."
~~~~~

Another time, a man came running in the office and yelled,
"Doctor, doctor! - my son just swallowed a roll of film!"
The doctor calmly replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops."
~~~~~

One patient came in and said, "Doctor, I have a serious memory problem."
The doctor asked, "When did it start?"
The man replied, "When did what start?"
~~~~~

I remember one time I told my doctor
I had a ringing in my ears.
His advice: "Don't answer it."
~~~~~

My doctor sure has his share of nut cases.
One said to him, "Doctor, I think I'm a bell."
The doctor gave him some pills and said,
"Here, take these -If they don't work, give me a ring."
~~~~~

Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards.
The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later."
~~~~~

When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places,
He told me to stop going to those places.
~~~~~

You know, doctors can be so frustrating.
You wait a month and a half for an appointment,
Then he says, "I wish you had come to me sooner."