A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"
His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?

The son replied, "I do know!"
"Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?"

"That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly,
It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'" (This one is my favorite.)

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There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible
to her brother in another part of the country.

"Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk.
"Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady.

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"Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world.
There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord,"
and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, its morning."

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A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time
and couldn't find a space with a meter.

Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read:
"I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment.
Forgive us our trespasses."

When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note
"I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job.
Lead us not into temptation."

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There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation:
"I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our
new gym-fellowship hall building program.
The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."

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While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to an Amish carriage.
The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage
was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass.
Caution: Do not step in exhaust."

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