The small church in town had a very attractive big-busted organist, and her breasts were so large that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ. Unfortunately, she distracted the pious Congregation considerably.

The very 'proper' Church ladies were appalled. They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist.
So, one of the senior ladies approached her very discreetly about the problem, and told her to mash up some green persimmons and rub them on her nipples & over her breasts, which should cause them to shrink in size!
But they warned her not to taste any of the green persimmons, because they are so sour that they would make her mouth pucker up, and she wouldn't be able to talk properly for awhile.

The voluptuous organist reluctantly agreed to try it.

The following Sunday morning the Minister walked up to the pulpit and announced ....

"Dew to thircumsthanthis bewond my contwol, we will not hab a thermon tewday!!"